Butterflies

The girls are on spring break right now, two weeks of it in fact.  Two weeks of waking to Bradley in the am, not an alarm clock.  It's a beautiful idea, too bad Bradley thinks the mornings are so quiet that he should be up at ten minutes to six most mornings.  Makes me almost long for the school days when I could occasionally sleep until 6:30.  But here nor there, we were sent home the class butterfly project.  Sydney was beside herself with excitement carefully watching each chrysalis and lamenting the apparent loss of one which was resting on the floor of the cage.  But I told her to take heart, the instructions indicated the possibility that even that one might produce a butterfly.

Turns out the instructions were right.  Our little friend that had fallen down would reveal a butterfly.  The first one had obviously ate the most and wrapped himself up and came out with a set of beautiful, large wings. The next one was a bit smaller, but barely.  The third one, smaller with slightly asymmetrical wings...and our fourth one...well, this one had the smallest set of wings and they were bent almost sideways and took quite some time to straighten up just slightly.  It took him longer to dry or even move at all so that we thought the little thing was in fact dead.  What a way to ruin the start of Easter morning.  Not only had all four emerged while Sydney was sleeping, but after sitting next to the counter and watching them throughout the first days, now one was dead?  She took it extremely hard, but maybe understandable.  You see, Dad lost a beloved aunt on Good Friday and though our girls never had the joy of meeting her, our girls are very loving and felt his pain as their own, trying to take some of his burden onto themselves.

When we returned home from church, we were all thrilled and hugely surprised to see the last butterfly flapping small, beautiful, albeit folded wings.  It was alive!  Sydney was thrilled but very worried about his wings, would he be able to fly?  I didn't know.  All throughout the day I found myself staring at the butterflies, watching with concern how well our fourth butterfly was fairing.  Resilient, brave...I gave this butterfly these attributes, and I spoke words of encouragement to him.  I told this butterfly and I told Sydney that if he couldn't fly he could spend his life with us, that we'd make sure he had a safe home for his two to four week life cycle.

Sure enough, he cannot fly.  When given the opportunity to try he fluttered near the ground and then sat on the concrete.  Rescuing him to put him safely into the net cage after a second attempt I could feel his body trembling in fear...I felt his fear and was stunned that he had any.  And I thought shame on me for being surprised that even a butterfly could experience the basest of emotion, fear.  So we brought everything inside, I gave him fresh sugared water and a brand new orange he doesn't have to share with anyone and hoped that he'd forgive me for scaring him so badly.  We won't try again at freedom, but Sydney believes fresh air and warmth outside will make it happy.  I felt his wings trembling, who am I to say whether he will feel happy or sad, excitement or joy...but I see a well deep with compassion in Sydney as she cares for this very special butterfly that was given into her care; and I know how that makes me feel.

We have two cats and one very special butterfly with broken wings.  The irony is not lost on me.  I never thought I was an exceptional person that was given Bradley because of it...I have always known that Bradley was a gift that I was given who makes me more than I was before him because he is exceptional.  Because of Bradley, I held my breath and spoke words of encouragement to a butterfly.  Because of Bradley, I moved with incredible speed and gentleness to rescue a butterfly once I knew it couldn't fly.  Because of Bradley, I see today the kind of compassionate and caring person my daughter is going to be.  She would no sooner turn away a broken butterfly then let anyone tell her that her brother is not perfect as he is.

Bradley didn't create a broken butterfly.  Bradley opened the eyes and hearts of a family to see beyond the usually accepted, and because we do, we can see a very special butterfly living in a net cage in my kitchen for as long a life as it can have.   A coincidence that we were asked to care for the class butterflies...hmmm, maybe.  But you know, a coincidence is just God's way of saying Hi.