We Need A Better Week

 October 16, 2022

It’s Sunday. Sunday means the start of a new week and I’m glad for it. This has been a hard week. Eric lost an Uncle he loved very much, a man I loved too as he and I were developing our own bond. This past week was his funeral and Eric’s struggle to figure out if he could be there. As he is having some fatigue issues likely related to his heart and a probable medicine adjustment, he didn’t go East. Definitely left him reeling for sure. 

Then Thursday, I almost lost one of my best friends to a stroke, and though she is home now - it’s her third and worries the dickens out of me. Doing this life without her doesn’t seem possible really, her support has always been solid. I am so grateful and Blessed she is home and in recovery now.

And then there’s my Bradley. Kind of a rough couple of days. His GI system seems to be attacking him in ways I don’t understand and can’t seem to balance out. Earlier today, he walked to his room and leaned against the dresser that has his changing pad on it. I followed him back expecting him to be wanting to change his shirt - but immediately knew, he wanted to be vented because he was struggling, hard. I scooped him up and put him on the table. I pulled air from his tummy, even as he retched and vomited what was likely trapped in his esophagus. These are never easy episodes and they always leave him exhausted and us shaken. We got it settled and then changed his shirt and Eric sat with him on the couch. One much protested, but sorely needed nap later, he has found his smile and laughter again and that is a relief. He was even sitting beside me vocalizing to Scooby Doo as we settled down for bed. 

He has never walked back to his room for venting on his own. Today was the very first time. Luckily I was following him or I wouldn’t have known until the retching started in loud earnest. Sometimes I just feel helpless, doing everything I know to do all the while knowing it’s not doing all that much for him until he basically clears it himself. And every time I just pray he can clear it. 

He sounds like a two pack a day smoker now, the mucus and fluid is stuck in his esophagus and rattles around there for however long it takes. And somehow we try to guard against pneumonia when he does this, try to keep another bout from happening and another. Trying to keep him from sending fluid down into his lungs. Every time he retches, we have to worry about aspiration and that leading to pneumonia. 

It’s funny. We were talking about empty nesters tonight. The girls were laughing saying that they would eventually move out… maybe. Eric told them we might move instead and leave them the empty nesters. What Eric and I both know, for us to ever truly be empty nesters - something horrible has to happen in our world. Needless to say, we’re absolutely okay with never being empty nesters. 

Starting a new week and hoping it’s better than the last. 

31For21 Blog Challenge for Down Syndrome Awareness and Acceptance - happy to always keep one little bird in our nest.