It was a long summer. There was a routine of course, but it was a bit difficult to pin down what it actually was, especially when you are a only six years old. While he was in the Extended summer program, Bradley went to school at 7:45 and stayed until 11:45. He was dropped off first and picked up last, he had no idea the logistics of all the running around that happened while he was gone. His oldest sister was taking two summer school classes, a Bridge class she had to take to try this Math 2 Honors thing, and the other was a Health Class that she took through Opportunities 4 Learning, where she had to meet twice a week for an hour with a teacher and work the rest of the time at home on her own; as a bit of a shy girl, this was better than sitting next to some boy and learning about STDs for the whole semester. :-). And she did great in both.
Sydney tackled a summer school program designed with the arts in mind and took a beginning Violin class. After a few squeaky starts and stops...by the end she was playing the "CanCan" and it sounded like the "CanCan" so we were pretty excited! And she loved learning it! Turns out she loves music and maybe being the ultra competitive kid that she is, she might have been branching into learning other instruments because her sister is really good on the trumpet. Sometimes in life, you take their competitive edge that they hold against each other and you let that just play itself out.
In Second grade, Sydney wanted to help Madison with her math, but Madison told her that Fourth grade math was too hard for her...I think that Eric and I could quite literally hear the gauntlet hit the ground! I think Sydney has been chasing Madison ever since, determined that someday she will be able to catch up and pass her sister. Who knows, maybe she will, Madison would get very defensive and down on herself because Sydney was so great at Math. I gave countless lectures about everyone having their own gifts and not everyone has the same gifts; and Eric and I have always been careful how we convey information to those we love regarding the latest wows about Sydney's brain. Probably not needed, or else...heeded...not sure because this summer, Madison came into her own in the world of math. She shocked herself by testing into Math 2 Honors, and she decided to tackle it. I credit her 8th grade math teacher that built up her skills, and especially her confidence. I was surprised by her testing score because she only seemed to try to please me because I asked her to just give it a shot so we'd know where she is in math. I also told her that if she needed to be in Honors to keep her brain working and growing, I would rather she work than take the easier math, get bored, slack off and disappoint herself. Apparently, she felt the same way and ended up doing great on the test and then even better throughout the five week Bridge course. I like the confidence she gained and the pride in her ability that she came out of that class with.
When Summer school ended for all the kids, there wasn't anticipated boredom that comes with summer, instead there was Volleyball. Madison made the Freshman volleyball team after a three day intensive tryout...but then three girls that were on vacation came in and they played with the summer league and practices for the next five weeks... on the very last day before the first game, my kid was cut. There is supposedly no connection between my kid who did not play Club Volleyball, and only did the clinics we could afford, and the twelve girls that had the Club Backpacks that they used because they had all played for the Coach's Club at some point in the past. One girl had never played Volleyball before at all, but was tall so they wanted her, and her mom knew how to play politics better than me, she let her daughter do a late Club tryout and told the Coach they had to look at it for the next few days, by the time they told the coach they weren't playing Club (and we knew they were never going to) the cuts had been made and she was on and Madison was off. Hmmm... No not a Club thing, but yet, the Club Clique was the end of Madison. She didn't know them and they didn't want to know her because they wanted their friends only. So on it goes.
So Bradley spent his summer running back and forth in Mom's car, spending a lot of time in his stroller watching movies, some volleyball, playing with his tiles on his movie, and napping. He didn't seem to be missing his sister all that much. I mean he didn't cry when she left, or look for her, so I thought that he was okay with her being gone. But I was wrong...
A couple days at the end of summer, while Madison was waiting to leave for practice, Bradley would find her, in her room or in my rocking chair. And he would climb up to sit on her lap, at first I thought he just wanted to check out her IPad and watch electronics with her. But every time, Bradley would lean in, hold her hair, put his head on her shoulder and would glide off to sleep, nestled against her. You see, maybe he doesn't vocalize that he misses his sisters but he lets them know in the sweetest ways. He follows them all over the house, he takes their hands and he pulls them to his toys, or to a chair, and sometimes he'll climb up besides them in a chair and find the peace he wants and needs, just by being as close as he can get to them.
Madison is fourteen and we know that by rights we only have four more years to hold onto her and then if she is ready to fly out of the nest, then we will help her spread her wings and go. But here at home, where the little boy that adores her the most waits, there will be heart break and confusion. Should Sydney follow her lead two years later...I can only imagine how even sadder and more lost he will be when he is left behind again. Had we been planning a third child, we'd have delivered him a little closer to the girls and not had this large age gap. But alas, mysteries and miracles happen in their own time, not ours and so it goes. Bradley will only be 10 when Madison is 18 and 12 for Sydney. In my head I have only his development today to gauge how he would react; in my heart, I can only hope that he develops to a point where he understands and through voice or sign - will have the ability to share screen time with either or both girls, should they venture out and away. It would not break my heart if they chose schools that kept them around as their brother continues to grow up and not so I can tap into their daily help, but just to be a part of his life...but it would be selfish to ask, so I don't and I won't. Instead, I try to help them prepare to chase their dreams with all the work they can do now to be ready later. And as I catch the occasional picture of them with Bradley in the most precious of moments, I know I am catching a small gift. And as Madison is growing up so fast, their moments happen less often, but hold so much more meaning because there is a sense of packing away the love and comfort for the lonelier moments in our later tomorrows.
No comments:
Post a Comment