10/21/2014
The magic of 21, this should be something special with a wealth of Awareness. Um, not really. I was thinking today of those that were waiting for us when we brought Bradley home from the hospital, they were the ones that were special. We were lucky to have Bradley where we were, having him in Japan was a gift beyond measure. The staff at the hospital were incredible and I love my midwife much like I would love a sister had God seen fit to give me one. But just as Fate put all of us in the same orbit at just the right moment to literally save Eric and I, the ones that were waiting at home did too.
We had the Rays...Chris and Sonya who cradled our girls like they were their own. Indulging them in Ice cream and trips to the park. They kept our then 5 and 7 year olds and made sure that they were safe and sound and that Sydney could pronounce "Bradley" before she got to the hospital. A week later when I would have my own bleeding scare and be back in the hospital, Sonya would walk into my room in tears because she couldn't get word about what was happening to me because she kept calling my phone and I had no idea where it was. They would bring us food and help hold our son, just being with us to help us through yet another tough night. When we finally did get things more settled at home, they would come up for days or weeks and stay and help with the girls and Bradley. They would both love on our all of our kids, and Uncle Chris would lay on the floor and work Bradley's limbs one by one, making every one stronger. Touchstones in a world turned upside down. Reminders that the love they had before for us, was just stronger now that we had this special little boy and his extra chromosome.
While they were taking care of the girls for us, the rest of our friends were making the trip to see us and meet Bradley. Most would have waited and visited when we got home, but Bradley came with gifts: shock, worry, fear, and guilt. Our friends came throughout the day, every day in the hospital to meet him, to hold him, to shower him in joy. They saved us too. They took the sting out of the word diagnosis and they returned the happiness of a new baby boy. Every one who came into our room and willingly asked to hold him reveled in how beautiful he was, how perfect. Some also brought stories or experiences of those they knew that were like Bradley. Words of comfort, and hope.
When we came home, we found a banner outside our door welcoming us and our Bradley Home. Between my dear friend and neighbor, and Eric's close friends...I didn't cook for the first few weeks. They knew my favorites and supplied them. :-) Lucky me! We even had one friend that medicated himself to fight off his cat allergies to come and make us an amazing meal. He visited us in the hospital and then came over the night we got home to make sure we had what we needed, then returned a few days later to spoil us with his considerable culinary skills.
We also received bouquets of flowers, teddy bears, and other gifts. Maybe more than we would have received had Bradley lacked that Extra chromosome? Maybe... The thing is, we were surrounded by some pretty amazing friends and I know that had we just had a baby, they would have rallied around to ease the first few days and to come and love on the baby. With Bradley there was so much shock for us, and I know for our friends. We didn't know, they didn't know. We were left reeling, and so were they. I think my friend's husband might have voiced the most common questions they all must have had: "What do we say? What do we do?" Her reply was simply: "Congratulate them, he's a baby!"
And that was that. He was a baby, a beautiful baby boy that wrapped people around his tiny little fingers. And that was all they needed. He was here, he was ours and they loved us, so they loved him. Maybe it was a big shock, and maybe not what we had expected. But he made it. He survived while I battled an aggressive form of Melanoma while pregnant with him, and everyone knew that. So why did they rally so much? Was it the Cancer or the extra chromosome? Does it actually matter? No. Our friends were the Family we needed, they helped us through one frightening moment to another. And they helped us let go of the dream we thought we were having to embrace the one we got. They were the definition of love and compassion and they wrapped us in it. Why do I still keep up on Facebook and Bradley's Buddy Brigade Facebook page? Those friends, that family are spread out all over the world and we don't want to lose them. They are part of that moment in time, that beautiful time when we fit in somewhere and knew we were Home. I miss them everyday and send them love and Blessings every chance I get.
Special 21? Yeah, they gave us so much then that we still feel it today!
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