Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Who I Am - Again

March 21st is World Down Syndrome Day.  We Celebrate that date specifically to honor the 3 Copies of the 21st Chromosome.  Last March, the International Down Syndrome Coalition put out a request for bloggers to to write about someone they love with Down syndrome.  I of course chose to take part, turns out I usually have a little too much to say.  Anyway, I figured I'd be too long winded, but had warmed to the topic and submitted it anyway.  I was honored to have my blog featured on their Facebook page during the Month of March to honor our loved ones with Down syndrome.  Knowing that my little boy's voice was going to be heard on a positive stage was awe-inspiring!  A lot has happened since March, so I thought today I would give you the blog that I wrote then because it helps to spread the idea of Awareness and Acceptance and that's all we truly want for Bradley.  I also know that some of you are new to the blog, possibly even a first timer today...possibly just now checking in because of the "31 For 21: Challenge" (welcome, and thanks for stopping by), so I thought it would be a good time to reprint "Who I Am" and let you gain some insight into Bradley.  I wrote this new introduction for today, and am leaving the remainder as it was in March, I hope you enjoy and I hope that through it, you can see the honor that I have to be Bradley's mom, and the amount of love that I carry in my heart and soul for my son.  Tomorrow, I will still talk about Bradley, I will continue "Who I Am" but it will be Part 2, the part that spans the last eight months of who he is becoming.  :-)  

Repost below:  
International Down Syndrome Coalition- IDSC:  
Write a blog post about the person you love, using the "Who I Am" theme.  
It's another challenge...and I am all about the challenges! ;-)  I mean my life doesn't offer enough so I should definitely be on the lookout for more.   Oh well, look at that - the Challenge was to incorporate "Who I Am" into my blog..and I did - so done!

Well not so fast.  We all know I am much more long winded than that, so there has to be more...there's always more.  I am actually supposed to Blog about someone I love with Down syndrome, that should be easy enough right...only, how do you put into words who my Bradley is, are there enough words?  I guess we'll just have to make sure there are.

I Am a Mom to three great kids, three amazing kids.  And though I could blather on about each of them forever, today it's about just one of them.  Today, it's about Bradley.  Though the girls don't say it often, there are times when it slips out that they think it's always about Bradley.  But then they quickly say, he's the baby and he's been sick.  They don't throw out there that he has Down syndrome too, because it isn't about the diagnosis: it's about the time away from home at hospitals, the extra effort to feed, bathe and care for him, it's about the delayed tuck-ins because we're still trying to get Bradley down while the girls are trying to stay awake to get that last tuck and kiss.  He takes a lot of work, he requires a lot of compromises - Daddy kisses and tucks tonight while they're awake, and Mommy kisses and tucks after they are asleep and tomorrow night we switch, and so on and so on.  And it works.

And it works...  Bradley has the ability to hold Chaos in one hand and Calm in the other; when he puts his hands together it's a maelstrom of activity - the Hurricane and the Eye...one shoe down, the other waiting to drop.  That's who he is.  He isn't a diagnosis, he's a force of nature.  Who is Bradley?

He is the baby that falls asleep in my arms, his cheeks flushed rosy in the warmth that happens between the two of us and the love that beats from his heart to mine.

He is the Daredevil that climbs up and over everything, and I mean everything - from the play yard to the baby gate, to the couch heedless of what might or might not catch him when he falls on the other side.

He is the consoler that reaches out to hold whomever is shedding tears, patting them on the back and laying his head on their shoulder.  Comforting by being sad with them.

He is the whisperer.  His words come in tiny sounds that make accidental words lost as quickly as they are found, but always heard on the wings of a whisper.

He is the communicator.  With his tiny fingers and little hands he uses his language to talk to me, and he makes sure that I understand the important points of our life together...  milk, eat, cookie, bath, diaper, more of everything.  Together he and I have learned over fifty signs, the trick is getting the family to catch up so he has someone else to talk too.

He is the dancer, on his own or in my arms, he dances beside me or he dances with his eyes sparkling as he looks up into mine before he hugs me tight and holds on for the ride.

He is the caretaker.  He dances with his baby as he turns in circles.  He rocks it back and forth - both front to back and side to side.  He lays it down and covers it up for sleeping and if the baby needs it, he sings to it by lying it down in his lap and signing the words to "Itsy, Bitsy, Spider" because that is his favorite.

He is the Charmer.  He is the bringer of joy to those who meet him.  His smile and adorable self encourage love while his temper reminds us that he is just like any other 3 year old boy Hell bent on giving his mom grey hairs.  And the combination makes for a frustrating albeit charming package.  

Is that it?  Is that enough?  No, there's more to Bradley.  There's always more.  With Bradley it's the way he makes you feel when he smiles at you, the way his big blue eyes capture your heart.  He doesn't say much with his mouth but his eyes speak from his soul encouraging you to be more than what you thought you could be, to love like you never thought you could, and to understand not only your place in this world but your place in his.  

I've spent my life trying to measure up, trying to live to my potential and always wondering where I land on that yard stick.  Who is Bradley?  He is the motivator, the push in my life to work harder and learn more to find every means to encourage and guide all three of my children to be who and what they are meant to be in this world.  Perhaps none of them will discover the cure for cancer or how to implement world peace, but honestly, I don't have those answers either.  But if I am lucky at all, all three of my children will feel their worth when they look in the mirror and each will always know how much they are loved.  

Who is Bradley?  He is more than enough, and so much more than we ever believed possible.  Considering we're really just getting started...who he will be is going to be one amazing journey!

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